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Why Are You Selfish?

Selfish, I'll take that as a rhetorical question
Because you really don't want to hear my aggression.
But since it's common from a mental health profession,
Listen for a second from a sufferer of major depression.

Now, I can aggravate you or make you relate
To the world of my psychological state,
But before I set you straight
Let's start by discussing my emotional traits.

Imagine persistent sadness, anxious, and empty moods
Feelings of hopelessness, worthlessness, and
  helplessness about everything you do.
I'm not describing a simple case of the blues.
What I'm speaking of leaves many dazed and confused.

Not to mention the insomnia, guilt, and constant overeating
Accompanied by restlessness, irritability, and physical
  symptoms repeating.
With darkened thoughts of death sometimes defeating
Having to take prescription pills that are not always treating.

Now I'm stuck in the dungeon of sadness and never ending
  pain.
I'm tired of the steady and dreaded days of endless rain,
And now it's about time to break the cycle and steel-linked
  chains
Along with the struggle of thinking I'm insane.

Go ahead and say you understand my fight
And that what I'm about to do just isn't right,
But if you truly know then things won't be all right
And you wouldn't have said that I didn't think before I tried to
  take my own life.

Actually I considered them first
And I also though I would be making things worse
But I believe if things were reversed
That nobody should have to live life cursed.

Now that I have brought you up to date
You should now know exactly what I faced
And why I choose my own fate,
And that it wasn't meant to bring about hate it was my only
  way to escape.

So, before you judge and try to accuse
About the path I decided to choose.
Put yourself in my shoes
Only then can you understand my point of view.

 

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Sharita from Louisville, Kentucky writes, “I wrote this poem when I was really depressed and people kept asking me why am I being selfish and not thinking of the people who love me.”